Sunday, November 6, 2011

The New Boss Around Here


     I was going to write about something wonderful about autumn. About the aroma of leaves ....the color of light ...the final bloom of some of my plants. Then, Dave called me to come outside and get a picture of the Praying Mantis he found on the latch of the gate door. I shot 64 pictures of this guy just trying to get a couple of good ones. After looking at them in photoshop I began to feel like he was trying to communicate with me. Just look at the focus on those eyes! Doesn't he seem to be looking right at you?!!!!





 "I want you to cook dinner from scratch tonight."




"Then I want you to clean the downstairs and do all of the laundry."



"This evening you must start a quilt....I want you to cut only small postage-stamp squares from all of your scraps and sew the little squares together."

Are you getting the picture? Look at his lips giving orders. I feel like I might start marching to a new master. But wait....maybe this would work on Dave. I'm going to get these printed up and write orders for Dave on each picture.



"Pssst....Dave.....I'm talking to you buddy....go to the garage and clean it up!"

It's clearly evident I have too much time on my hands! I will be back to normal tomorrow!

Until later dear friends.

Alma



33 comments:

  1. Do you think he was trying to tell you something?!

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  2. Alma, I laughed out loud reading this post. That was hilarious, but I really think it was only your guilty conscience speaking, not the mantis. Maybe I need to find a mantis to prompt me to cook and clean. My conscience seems to be taking a break!

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  3. Never mind prompting ME to do those things, I'm looking for one who will be so disgusted by all the mess, that he will do it himself, hahahaha.

    He definitely looks like an alien being, and those pictures are fantastic!

    Julie

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  4. If you could read praying mantis lips I bet he/she was saying "get that @#*%! camera out of my face"!

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  5. Seriously so funny!!!! They are such strange-looking insects.

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  6. I think he was telling you he wants to learn to stitch and quilt.
    Catherine
    diamondc

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  7. Uh...good luck with that! Maybe I can borrow him?

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  8. Those things creep me out big time! Good luck and let us know if you ended up following his orders to start a postage stamp quilt. Demanding little fellow isn't he?

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  9. lol! Let us know if the messages to DH work. That is some praying mantis! Wow!

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  10. did he want that quilt praying mantis sized, or human sized? :)

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  11. this is one of my favorite insects they are so very prehistoric looking. I found one once while I was grocery shopping, it was in the veggie area. I picked it up and put it outside so that noone would kill it.
    You captured your now found boss very well with the shots you took.
    Don`t lose that creative mind you have Alma it is great, lucky there was no puppitering

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  12. LOLOL, I love this post. Great photos too. You know, years ago when my daughter was in the 5th grade they had an assignment to do a bug collection...you know, catch, kill and pin the bugs on a board. I was horrified by this requirement. Also, they would not get any credit for the assignment if it did not include a Praying Mantis. Now, I've always thought of these amazing creatures as 'helpful' and still do. Though you don't want to let one lurk on your hummingbird feeders because they do kill and eat the birds!!! All the same, when I found one, off to the garden it went. Okay, back to the bug collection. I took exception with the teacher because my daughters were raised to appreciate all forms of life but the teacher did not relent. So, we collect a Mantis, put it in the bottle of turpentine soaked cotton balls as directed and close the lid tightly. The poor thing started scratching on the sides of the bottle and as I walked around the room, it would turn first it head, following my movements then it's body. Well, I of course (with tears streaming down my face, I'm a soft touch I know) opened the bottle and took the poor thing outside. I sat with it on my knee for what seemed like a long time before it finally flew up into the tree and I figured it would be alright. The teacher gave my daughter an F, but after a visit to the principle by one very offended and upset mom, he gave her an alternative assignment of writing a report about several species of bugs. Several parents called me that night and said they wish they had spoken up too. Well, that was the last year any bugs were collected by the children of that school. So...point is, I can hear your Mantis speaking perfectly, so...you had best get busy on those postage stamp squares. *wink*

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  13. What a scream!! I never would have thought that a praying mantis would be so expressive. :-D

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  14. You are hilarious! I can hear his voice, similar to the Nasonex bee (Antonio Banderos). Hahaha you slay me!

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  15. Great pix. Aren't they most interesting? One flew right in front of me about six weeks ago and landed in a nearby bush. I wasn't at home and did not have my camera. I think that was the first praying mantis I've seen in years.

    The story about the teacher making the kids capture and kill them was horrifying. I'm glad the poster and some of the other parents used the good sense to defy such heartless and careless instruction.

    Bobbi

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  16. No, he's really trying to say "GO STITCH!!" lol!
    Great pics!

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  17. nice pictures..he is sweet i think :)

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  18. Adorable! Funny! Enjoyed your take on the body/eye connection!

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  19. Great pics, but reminds me of the time I was about 7 yrs old. My sister caught one and put it in a jar - must have had it for at least a week in the room we shared. We woke up one morning and the thing had hatched eggs and there were millions that had come out of the jar from the holes punched in the top....... she fainted. I've never gotten that sight out of my head, and makes me feel creepy crawly when I see them!!

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  20. Goodness he spoke with such authority, just with his body movements and eyes, and of course those lips, I would listen.

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  21. great pictures. I have these in my garden.

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  22. Oh! Preying Mantis can look so scary! But they are beautiful, too. Such long, delicate limbs. This one is your substitute for Jiminy Cricket? How fun! Happy Fall!

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  23. OMG! They are such alien-looking creatures, aren't they? Probe, anyone? Ewwww! Can you believe that teachers would ask children to destroy such wonder? I know their argument would be something about knowing the species, but what better way to get to know them than by photographing them as you did. Kudos to you, Alma, for studying without harming.

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  24. And that right there is why I stay far, far away from anything that looks like that!

    If you find one that tells you to order out for dinner and hire a housecleaning service so that you can go stitch, let me know. I'll help you feed him/her.

    You're so funny. :)

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  25. I got the WILLIES! Sticky legs....EEEEUUUUUU

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  26. hummm, well Alma...even though my whole goal in life is to be you...I'm thinking market must have been very exhausting for you! LOL

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  27. Hysterical, he does look very authoritative! I think he's saying take me to the Brown sugar turkey!! NOW!!
    :)

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  28. OMG too funny!!! I laughed out loud when I read the part about printing them up and putting "orders" on them for Dave! What a hoot.

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  29. Hah! You are too funny! I think you have been eating some of the Brown Sugar Turkey already and the mantis knows your dirty little secret! The look on his face in the last picture is a look of "no more pictures lady or I will land on your Brown Sugar Turkey on Thanksgiving Day!

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  30. Hilarious! My second-graders and I just finished a praying mantis book. They're going to love these pictures.

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  31. You and your new boss crack me up! I'd do what he is telling you!

    Blessings!

    Donna

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